How to alienate your clients/customers

…in 3 easy steps!

Step 1: Take 19 days to reply to a customer service-type question.

Here’s a real-life example. My husband and I have what we call a “sucky thing”–one of those vacuum sealer things to preserve food. And boy-howdy, does it suck. It has, in fact, broken after hardly any use but months after its purchase. I contacted the maker asking what could be done about it. Here below is the reply.

From: RivalService <RivalService@speedymail.com>
Date: July 9, 2007 12:39:15 PM PDT
To: XXXXXX@gmail.com
Subject: Re: Rival Comments/Questions – From Leslie Dell’Acqua [#1751106]
Reply-To: RivalService@speedymail.com

Leslie,

It can be replaced under warranty and you would need to send the seal a meal back to us and pay for all of the shipping and handling charges. Feel free to contact the Holmes customer service line at 1-800-777-5452 to have it replaced under warranty. Ruben


–Original Message–
From: XXXXXX@gmail.com
Date: 6/20/2007 1:30:18 PM
To: RivalService@speedymail.com
Subject: Rival Comments/Questions – From Leslie Dell’Acqua

Sure, they offer to repair/replace it if I pay for shipping both ways (about the cost of a new one, btw, maybe more with the mysterious “handling” charge), but note the date on my original request (6/20) and the response (7/9).

Step 2: Call your email “speedymail” (note the return email address) but take almost 3 weeks to reply.

Step 3: Get your customer’s name wrong (left out the “Burns-” part).

We won’t even mention that the correct spelling of the product’s name is “Seal-A-Meal”– a registered trademark with hyphens.

Sure, your clients might take forever to get back to you, and often they won’t even bother to let you know when you don’t get a project, but you don’t get that same luxury. Reply within 1 business day to any contact–even if it is just to say “I’m swamped and will get back to you shortly.” Also, get her/his name right. And yours, too.

Think I’m going to buy another Rival product any time soon? Your clients have even shorter fuses. It’s a simple thing to stay in contact today, and its payoffs are big.

One Reply to “How to alienate your clients/customers”

  1. It can be deadly these days for consumer companies to fall short of expectations. One can’t begin to calculate what poor customer service can do in this blogging age. Even though I have no current need for one of those “sucky things”, I wouldn’t even think of buying one from Rival after reading your post.

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